restless

Feeling restless lately and the new system at work is giving me headaches. it's not complicated but the perfectionist in me needs to have everything right so each time I forget something etc. I am like argh..I also get confused because I have the tendency to read off the screen (versus before where you did not have to do the notes while on the phone). Well I'm still trying to find ways improve myself and it does bug me how simple calls that were under 10 mins are over 10 mins because of the new system.

They changed my seat again but at least I won't be next to an empty desk. What sucks is that I won't be able to gossip with C :(

Finished walking 20 mins from Sq One to my apart. I did not feel like taking the bus and it was so nice to feel the wind in my face. The only mistake I made was to stuff myself with a green tea frappuccino. Days are too hot for a relaxing walk. I'm home sick. I often found myself gazing at the city lights and traffic, missing home. Over a year in Toronto and something is amissed.

My appointment with the dentist was ..interesting..and now I understand why kids have a fear of dentists..Seriously I was like WTF. The cleaning part was ok but painful. the filling part was.. torture...ok close to.. Because it's my inner teeth that needed fillings, I had something inserted in my mouth to keep it open (ZOMG so often I thought I was choking), and they inserted all kinds of weird instruments in my mouth and even numbed half of it. I was like: since when do you numb the mouth for fillings???? OK dentists here are supposed to be more sophisticated than the ones in Mauritius..still add that to the fact I had to keep my jaw opened for 1 hr for cleaning, it was not a very pleasant experience. Then off to work.

I have another appointment again for 2 hours but I am going to break it in 2 because I don't want to have to keep my freaking jaw opened for 2 hrs. I might have to get my wisdom teeth removed and I will do it on a Friday and take the week-end one *devil grin*

Last week-end was my first and last week-end off until December and it was the most interesting. It feels different to be off on a week day and on a week-end. There is less traffic and less noise in the street esp. on Sunday. Nice for a "grasse matinée" . Had my combat class with an instruction who looked like the boy's bf and at one pt I was wondering if it was a he or she. I still miss Kelly, the best combat instructor I had so far. The other don't take time to explain the movements properly and are too busy singing the song. *shrug*

Did some journalling as well and here goes another week

I have fallen behind in my creative endeavours. It has been weeks since I touched my journal and I have a few trades to complete *sigh* I need motivation, inspiration and sleep! Today I had a 6 am shift and slept for 4 hrs. Stress? I like early morning shifts: to be able to gaze at the sky, the sunrise, quietness of the streets and the few lights from houses/condos, the smell of sleep on people-not pleasant and yummy scent of coffee.

Most wild life are active at dusk or dawn. I did not spot any deers this time but saw a wild rabbit crossing old derry road before the bus. Thanks god it was not run over. Saw a wood pecker as well and a few birds I rarely see during the day.

Also went to see the dentist and had an unpleasant surprise. I do acknowledge it is my fault for having skipped my annual dental exam those past years (The dentist I loved passed away-he treated me since I was a kid- and since then my mother has been going to some shady dentist in china town. I dislike his service. He does teeth cleaning without gloves and jeez..icky) The damage: 6 cavities (sh*t!!!) and gum inflammation. The result: 3-4 future visits to the dentist for cavity fillings, deep cleaning and possibly pulling out my wisdom teeth. The only thought I had in mind was :my poor wallet.

I always thought I had good dental hygiene but apparently I am brushing and flossing the wrong way. Maybe the nightmares about my teeth falling out were premonitions. The dentist said I had some bone loss and all this time I thought some space was due to my wisdom teeth pushing my other teeth ><; shuck..I even mentioned that to the shady dentist who saw nothing wrong. This is so ironical given that I used to have teeth in top condition as per my dentist who passed away.

Jeezzz.. At least I can prevent the condition from worsening. I knew something was wrong when I started having tooth pain on my lower left side (first tooth pain since I lost my milk teeth!! I never had cavities before. I guess there's a beginning to everything or is it old age??). Today I called my dentist for an earlier appointment since the teeth are bothering me, it's painful on and off. I even skipped sushi dinner because of that! Co-workers planned a sushi dinner and because of the pain I decided not to go although I confirmed my presence-pain was not that bad on Monday.

The joy of teeth and I already know it will cost me $ 800 for my next appointment for filling and cleaning. At least I have insurance. It's all I can think about. The cavities are minor as per my dentist and there's not much work but still it'll be $ 902 for 6 teeth. I don't even want to think what it would cost for bigger cavities!

On the bright side, I got myself a fuji instax 25s. Yay for polaroid :) It'll make my art journalling more interesting. They're just too cute. I wished I was more asian. sometimes it looks fun to act fobby and make fish faces and v sign xD