I have fallen behind in my creative endeavours. It has been weeks since I touched my journal and I have a few trades to complete *sigh* I need motivation, inspiration and sleep! Today I had a 6 am shift and slept for 4 hrs. Stress? I like early morning shifts: to be able to gaze at the sky, the sunrise, quietness of the streets and the few lights from houses/condos, the smell of sleep on people-not pleasant and yummy scent of coffee.

Most wild life are active at dusk or dawn. I did not spot any deers this time but saw a wild rabbit crossing old derry road before the bus. Thanks god it was not run over. Saw a wood pecker as well and a few birds I rarely see during the day.

Also went to see the dentist and had an unpleasant surprise. I do acknowledge it is my fault for having skipped my annual dental exam those past years (The dentist I loved passed away-he treated me since I was a kid- and since then my mother has been going to some shady dentist in china town. I dislike his service. He does teeth cleaning without gloves and jeez..icky) The damage: 6 cavities (sh*t!!!) and gum inflammation. The result: 3-4 future visits to the dentist for cavity fillings, deep cleaning and possibly pulling out my wisdom teeth. The only thought I had in mind was :my poor wallet.

I always thought I had good dental hygiene but apparently I am brushing and flossing the wrong way. Maybe the nightmares about my teeth falling out were premonitions. The dentist said I had some bone loss and all this time I thought some space was due to my wisdom teeth pushing my other teeth ><; shuck..I even mentioned that to the shady dentist who saw nothing wrong. This is so ironical given that I used to have teeth in top condition as per my dentist who passed away.

Jeezzz.. At least I can prevent the condition from worsening. I knew something was wrong when I started having tooth pain on my lower left side (first tooth pain since I lost my milk teeth!! I never had cavities before. I guess there's a beginning to everything or is it old age??). Today I called my dentist for an earlier appointment since the teeth are bothering me, it's painful on and off. I even skipped sushi dinner because of that! Co-workers planned a sushi dinner and because of the pain I decided not to go although I confirmed my presence-pain was not that bad on Monday.

The joy of teeth and I already know it will cost me $ 800 for my next appointment for filling and cleaning. At least I have insurance. It's all I can think about. The cavities are minor as per my dentist and there's not much work but still it'll be $ 902 for 6 teeth. I don't even want to think what it would cost for bigger cavities!

On the bright side, I got myself a fuji instax 25s. Yay for polaroid :) It'll make my art journalling more interesting. They're just too cute. I wished I was more asian. sometimes it looks fun to act fobby and make fish faces and v sign xD

My new schedule is in and it's not that bad. 7 am to 3 pm everyday, 2 days off in the week and all week-end. I grumbled because I did not have 2 days in a row off but let's see the good side: I work 2 days then off and 3 days then off. It makes the week shorter.

I sacrificed my week-ends to have early shifts, free afternoons. Not a bad deal and I doubt I'll trade with anyone. Enough said. I'm tired and trying to find back my motivation for doing my job. My May audit was good and my Q2 much better than Q1 but there's still a long way to go. It sucks..

I had my industrial/scaffold piercing done and so far so good. It hurts.. T_T When I told that to the boy (he googled industrial piercing), his only comment was "poor ear"..Lower back tattoo is next. What bothers is is that healing time is said to be 2 months as per the piercer but as per people who were pierced, it is as long as a year since it's a cartilage piercing. I can't remember how long it took for my right ear and one hole heals faster than 2 holes hold by a barbell.

I like it although right now it's a bit swollen, red and painful which is normal within the few days- weeks after the piercing. If it was not that painful, I would have love to have a cage or a rook but I don't want to go through the piercing pain again. You DO feel it when they pierce the cartilage and since it's hard, they have to apply pressure and it's like when you push a needle through hard leather. I could feel the needle pushing the "meat". Hurts more than getting your ear lobes done. Yikes..

Mary Poppins is coming to Toronto as a musical show. It's amongst my favourite Disney movies so you bet I have to see it. I won't do the same error as with Tim Burton where I waited the last minute and never went to see the expo. I feel so bad about it.

I have been stuffing myself with "O fortuna" by Carl Off and songs by Era. Latin is sexy. To understand the translated words of O fortuna make the song even sweeter. The boy does not understand why I want to learn a dead language. Latin reminds me of biology courses where my teacher would translate the different names, origins and roots. Understanding them was like having a "aha!" moment. I think it's cool to be able to understand some texts in their original language since so much can be lost in translation.

Been also stuffing myself with books by Richard Dawkins. There's a passage where he mentioned how knowing the origin/cause of something did not decrease its value but increased our sense of wonder which is something I always thought and could relate to e.g. knowing that a rainbow is made by the reflection of light on raindrops etc. does nothing to change my sense of wonder on seeing a rainbow.

Some people think science is cold and materialist but wait until you listen to a scientist speak about the beauty of science. My chemistry teacher was like that, speaking of the beauty of chemical reactions, of chemical bonds etc.. which is weird because beauty is not a word you would associate with science especially at the molecular level. I can still remember her expression perfectly: a smile and twinkling eyes as she described the reactions and energy changes involved.

It's the same beauty I see in Biology, the beauty how everything fits perfectly although there is no designer, the amazing process of evolution etc. Last time I was coming from Tim Horton and saw 2 hawks gliding over our office building. It was amazing to see how they glide in the sky, this easiness and the shape of their wings. They were like kites. No wonder birds look "free" to us when they fly.

I should stop rambling..

mattress is there

at last..and security let them in. the best part was my laptop was on and opened on the webpage "sears suck". yay!! and they still suck- can't doc cases properly, make you pay for special when they don't follow the instructions , you call zillion of times-8 calls ... and y,x and z know nothing . puh!

more mattress headache

Just got a call from sears delivery that they are coming in 20 mins. I was like WTF..My PAID delivery (had to pay for special time slot) is between 4-6 pm. I advised him that and he had the guts to tell me to just book the elevator. SCREW YOU. I did not pay $ 75 for special for you to come earlier because non special delivery are FREE. Do you think, I requested a special time slot because I was feeling generous and wanted to give 75 extra to your company??????

Called sears scheduling who are not aware of anything-says they don't do timed delivery, called the store, redirected to customer service who said they did put a notice and to call delivery. Now the lady on the phone from delivery said that the driver will try his best to accommodate my request. Try his best?? SCREW YOU. you better be there between 4- 6 pm because I have no booking for that damn elevator other times. I'm so pissed and frustrated. If my instructions are not followed, I'm so going to call sears and log a complaint for non respect of instruction and get my $ 75 back. Corporate companies SUCK dick: fast to take your money but slow to read instructions, deliver etc..

Gosh I am so not going to buy any mattress from them in the future. Next time I'm off to a smaller company with better service. The fact that I've been sleeping on a floor mattress for several days is doing nothing to improve my mood as well. jeez. Too bad there's no combat classes today :/ I'm wasting my vacation for a mattress.

life set back ad annoyances

So I took 2 days off work only to be waiting for a mattress and having people get on my nerves. In the end, it's frustrating to live in a condo. I'm also looking for a family doctor. My cousin referred me to hers but he's closing down due to family/personal issues. Although healthcare is "free" it is such a complicated and tedious system.

I had a rant about my mattress but blogger was down so I am calmer now. I could not get my mattress due to a moron at the front desk giving me the wrong info. So mattress is scheduled to be delivered for today. What pisses me off is that I waited for 6 hrs for the delivery and in the end, I had to pay $75 for timed delivery as the slot I was given and elevator slots were not matching. That's life. Maybe I've been given too many things when I was a kid so that I am easily frustrated by things. I had reasons to be mad for the mattress though because I was given the wrong info TWICE: on the phone and when I went to the desk.

I missed my taebo class as well (was on the phone waiting for sears to reschedule which they could do after 7 hrs..) Seriously. At least my current job enables me to learn how to be a bitchy customer on the phone. I'm usually the passive-agressive type but now I am learning how to be more vocal when pissed because if customers are willing to make your life miserable because of a company, well why can't I? especially if it is justified..

Jeez should get all my frustration out doing combat classes than bitch..seriously :(