wiped out

I'm in love with these two websites:

http://comics.lucyknisley.com- I can really relate to her

http://www.pikaland.com- eye candy

<3 illustrator sites. Feeling wiped out after waking up at 5 am for work. I'm so not functional today :/ note to self: surround myself with men who cook. If i hear one more time what's for dinner (from my brother) i'm going to break something :/ seriously..

blogger is refusing to upload my print screen..and i'm too tired to fight with it..

random rambling

I guess sleeping at midnight to wake up at 5:30 AM everyday is not what I would call a smart choice. I had a look at my face before lunch today and I was like WTF: puffy eyes and dark under circles which were not visible from my bathroom mirror (incandescent light.. misleading..fluorescent lights.. evil!). My body is still adjusting to my new hours and a few times I crashed in bed only to wake up the following day-when I am off.

I did some cleaning-my life has been limited to cleaning, eat and sleep lately :/ and need to list some stuffs on ebay. Hoarding is baaaaadddd..

I managed to pull 5 bags of supplies and I need to sell some of my sanrio items: hoarding from my uni years. Getting rid of some Danier coin purses as well. I'm an impulsive shopper and easily lured by colours so I can easily buy 2-3 items just because they have lovely colours. Fall trend also looks like it'll be the colours I dig: burgundy, deep purple, vintage gray, deep cool blueeessss all in the richer earth-autumnal tones. Note to self: stay away from the mall.

I also found my cds from 2000-2005 and it was a trip down memory lane: Covenant, Apoptygma Berzerk, Placebo, Assemblage 123, The Cure, Smashing Pumpkins, Radiohead, Silverchair.. and my taste has not changed. It's funny to have CDs with Silverchair as kids when now they're full grown adults. Times flies.

Also spent some time cutting papers for bookbinding. There's something destressing about cutting papers: the repetitive act of measuring and cutting has a soothing effect on the brain. It's the same feeling when you grind-mix ink before doing chinese calligraphy, as if you empty the brain of all the junk and concentrate on one simple act. Now I have to bind them. I have 3 folders of 12x12 papers and I know I will never be able to use them since I don't do scrapbooking, only visual journalling so better use the papers to bind future journals where I can ramble to my heart content...I write more than I talk in real life. How sad is that?

We're almost midway in summer. Can you believe that? Most of my days are in the office and I still have to see more of Toronto parks especially the Scarborough bluffs and I just learned about wasaga beach! Need to make an extra effort to make that happen before it gets too cold. And I'm soooo tempted by Rouge park however going there alone does not tempt me too much since it looks like one huge park compared to High Park and other places. Sucks to be a lone hiker.

Also had my hair cut and I was given a bob cut that becomes longer at the front because of my round face. One thing has not changed though: bad and bed hair day..everyday..I don't have straight chopstick asian hair. Mine has a wave-curl depending on the days but it always look messy. Apparently it's a common issue with wavy-curly hair. I have fine hair as well so any hair products or processing is a big NO NO. Don't want to lose more than what I am losing already with the stress and high chlorinated water *smirk* we'll see although it was time to chop them off. It started looking like a bush growing out of shape :/

save me from drowning

summer is here

The heat in Toronto is intolerable. On Sunday I saw someone flying a kite and it was sweet. I've not seen kites in the sky for years. It's good to see how some traditional games are still played. There was also a red moon on Sunday night. I thought I would be able to take a picture but the moon was over the lake so not visible from my balcony :(

I also had an interview for a position at the back end. After the interview, I decided to remove myself from the competition. It's mainly admin work with regular hours which is perfect if the salary was not 3k below what I am currently earning. Doing a quick maths, the biweekly salary will be just enough for my monthly rent making 50% salary in rent, keeping in mind that now we are sharing between 3 people and at the end of the year, it will be two and i will pay more. I'm willing to grind my teeth until I get something better and higher pay. I am not alone in this job feeling crappy but bills have to be paid and some have it worse. I know some who work TWO jobs although they earn more than I do.

this is discouraging how you have to work yourself to death.

brain farts

seriously..I just returned home by taxi after my midnight shift only to realize that there was a bus at 12:05 today..which could have saved me $21 in taxi fees. It slipped out of my mind although I checked the schedules earlier during the day. It is tomorrow that I am supposed to take the taxi as the last bus is 8 pm on holiday/sunday T_T brain fart indeed

Just like 2 days ago my colleage was asking me :jambe- leg, pied- foot?? and I was like ??????? and told him 3 times that I did not understand him. He was simply asking if jambe in french is leg in english and pied is foot in english. For some reason, i had a brain fart where it was like ????? in my head and I was like: what???wtf is he asking about leg-jambe etc.. *shake head* It's nothing new that I overthink and overanalyze to the point where I end up looking and being dumb.

argh..*pull hair*

lemming a tamron 28-75 mm lens for my trip..500 bucks.. :/

this body is getting old

Breaking out like crazy, and I need to call my doctor for an appointment. Got rashes on both arms, feet rash not going away and I might need a minor outpatient surgery for something. I just have to confirm that when I see the doctor and not to forget the dentist next week. Also need new contact lenses..

I do believe most is stress related..le sigh..

At least weekly combat class helps. I did it twice last week and it was so much better although with my new schedule I can only do it once a week.

Also <3 quinoa after tofu..might replace rice in my plate. yummy. will try to do sushi on monday. let's cross fingers and toes..

restless

Feeling restless lately and the new system at work is giving me headaches. it's not complicated but the perfectionist in me needs to have everything right so each time I forget something etc. I am like argh..I also get confused because I have the tendency to read off the screen (versus before where you did not have to do the notes while on the phone). Well I'm still trying to find ways improve myself and it does bug me how simple calls that were under 10 mins are over 10 mins because of the new system.

They changed my seat again but at least I won't be next to an empty desk. What sucks is that I won't be able to gossip with C :(

Finished walking 20 mins from Sq One to my apart. I did not feel like taking the bus and it was so nice to feel the wind in my face. The only mistake I made was to stuff myself with a green tea frappuccino. Days are too hot for a relaxing walk. I'm home sick. I often found myself gazing at the city lights and traffic, missing home. Over a year in Toronto and something is amissed.

My appointment with the dentist was ..interesting..and now I understand why kids have a fear of dentists..Seriously I was like WTF. The cleaning part was ok but painful. the filling part was.. torture...ok close to.. Because it's my inner teeth that needed fillings, I had something inserted in my mouth to keep it open (ZOMG so often I thought I was choking), and they inserted all kinds of weird instruments in my mouth and even numbed half of it. I was like: since when do you numb the mouth for fillings???? OK dentists here are supposed to be more sophisticated than the ones in Mauritius..still add that to the fact I had to keep my jaw opened for 1 hr for cleaning, it was not a very pleasant experience. Then off to work.

I have another appointment again for 2 hours but I am going to break it in 2 because I don't want to have to keep my freaking jaw opened for 2 hrs. I might have to get my wisdom teeth removed and I will do it on a Friday and take the week-end one *devil grin*

Last week-end was my first and last week-end off until December and it was the most interesting. It feels different to be off on a week day and on a week-end. There is less traffic and less noise in the street esp. on Sunday. Nice for a "grasse matinée" . Had my combat class with an instruction who looked like the boy's bf and at one pt I was wondering if it was a he or she. I still miss Kelly, the best combat instructor I had so far. The other don't take time to explain the movements properly and are too busy singing the song. *shrug*

Did some journalling as well and here goes another week

souvenirs

chut...je reve...

summer is flying

this is what i do during lunch when i work week-ends: feed birds..lol

and all i've seen so far is the background of the office. I guess you can never be happy satisfied when working shifts (with the assigned schedules) and now Monday and Friday are my off days until December. No time to enjoy patios, summer fests, food fests, BBQs and all of a sudden you are thrown into the red, orange colours of fall and dullness of winter. 2 more months before fall!! ZOMG

I find life in ssauga sucks shit and I live in a suburb and building full of m... I feel cruddy. Complaining is not going to lead anywhere. Well there's always next summer??

I feel a bit bummed that I missed Pride an the absence of TO mayor created quite some noise.

note to self: Mary Poppins musicals coming in Nov