Monday, March 22, 2010

cleaning and still cleaning

"Live today. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Just today. Inhabit your moments. Don't rent them out to tomorrow. Do you know what your doing when you spend a moment wondering how things are going to turn out tomorrow? What am I doing? Your cheating yourself out of today. Today is calling to you, trying to get your attention, but your stuck on tomorrow, and today trickles away like water down a drain. You wake up the next morning and that today you wasted is gone forever. It's now yesterday. Some of those moments may have had wonderful things in store for you, but now you'll never know. ” Jerry Spinelli

“Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.” Mark Victor Hansen (born 1948)

Yesterday we had a rainy day and it was lovely because I love the smell of rain and wet leaves/soil. It's a welcomed change from the grey overcast we've been having lately. I'm either a sunny or rainy person.. For some reason, cloudy days makes me grumpy :/ my legs and arms ache after my tae bo sessions but I am determined to go to the end. I hope not to strain a muscle or something.

There might be a change of plan in my departure:leaving Thursday instead of Saturday. I've been put on a waiting list for Paris instead of London because my relatives who're coming to pick me up at the airport need to leave Montreal on Sunday than Monday-My aunt could not get her Monday off. To be honest I'll rather transit through Paris to avoid the 8 hours killer transit in Heathrow airport. It'll also give me time to talk to my aunt's sister in law about my plans to stay at her place for a while. If I land on Sunday from London, I've barely time to say hello and we leave the same night. I land at 17:50, shall be out around 18:30 or later after doing the immigration procedures and we need to leave Montreal same day at 21:00 for Toronto. So after 8 hours transit, 20 hours by plane, now i'll be heading for 8 more hours by car to Montreal! It's going to kill me..LOL

oh well let's cross fingers but I do feel bad to leave earlier esp for the bf. Else I'm almost done cleaning upstairs and now I need to remove stuffs in my bedroom. There're so many things I want to bring but I doubt I'll have enough weight :( everything left behind will be obsessively labeled so that my mother does not give my stuffs away!! Jeez I want to sell everything and buy all new in Montreal/Toronto. Bleeehhh. and the Canadian dollar is not decreasing. *sad* I still have more funds to exchange. Stressful stressful.

I'm working slowly on my journal pages and I believe I'll leave most of my scrap papers behind if there's no space to bring them. My creative style has changed and I tend to make my own papers than use ready made ones, unless for collage. we'll see.

On an unrelated note,what is the big deal about Lady Gaga?? Sure her style is eccentric but else she's just another manufactured artist IMO, a bit like the Madonna of 2010. I saw her video clip "bad romance" and was like o.O LOL I guess I'm getting old.

Friday, March 19, 2010

“Never regret yesterday. Life is in you today, and you make your tomorrow.” L. Ron Hubbard

today i had lunch with my former co-workers and it was so nice to see some of them again :) We were looking for roast pork but ended having something different which was not so bad. I'm feeling better as well and watching too many movies. So far I saw Coco avant Chanel (I was not really gripped by the movie. After a while the "chanel pout" à la Tatou was becoming a bit tiring and i don't know; it lacked something or maybe I was too distracted by Alessandro Nivola??
He's so yummy in this movie, at least those sultry gazes he gives chanel *sigh* I found him less interesting later when i went to check his pictures LOL. I still love Audrey Tatou though), Seraphine (long! but very well played by Yolande Moreau although I found some parts a bit loose), The Maid (lovely asian movie made in Singapore about ghosts and gives an overview of the Chinese beliefs during the Hungry Ghost month), Ju-ON the grudge 2 (japanese version), tale of two sisters (korean).

I love asian horror movies more than American ones since they're full of creepy creatures-I do get a bit fed up of the long hair, no/white face woman who "croaks"though- and traditional beliefs and superstitions are merged. Watching french movies as well made me realize how much I miss them as local movie theaters play mainly american blockbusters or Bollywood ones. I'm in love with the lush countrysides of the Provence and it's definitely *the* part of France where I'll love to settle down one day with my little cottage (I guess I've been reading books by Marcel Pagnol too often) and garden. If not France then I'm off for the British/Irish/Wales countrysides and go fairies hunting! Sometimes I feel like I was borned the wrong era but well.. I hope I'll have more opportunities to watch french movies in Montreal and I appreciate the fact that they've a film festival for french and international movies. American mass productions are excluded so that should be interesting to discover new independent productions.

Jeez I need to download more movies. On an unrelated, one of the reason why I love the Mac/Safari interface:

I was spared the hassle/frustration of going through all my history pages to look for a site I vaguely remembered and wanted to go back to. All I remembered was the contents and pictures. Thanks God the Mac interface is very intuitive to use and makes life so much easier even when you have to force quit applications! My only complain with Mac is the price else I doubt I'll be back to windows!! I had to use my mom's netbook and windows XP was rather painful..LOL I need to try windows 7 as i heard rather good things about it. Maybe I should install it together with Leopard OS on my future iMac.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


I've no idea whether it's the heat but lately I've been feeling very lethargic and i spend whole afternoons sleeping which is not very pleasant esp when you get up feeling sticky with sweat and achy. Last week was bf birthday and we spent it at Le Caudan Waterfront, we had sushi for lunch:yummy salmon sashimi, cucumber maki and salmon and smoked marlin sushi. There was also a japanese beef salad and "croque monsieur" and a beef tortilla. It was very enjoyable and the bf also bought me a wooden dodo. It's so cute and smells good! I was looking for some souvenirs to bring along with me when I'll be missing the white beaches and blue sea. I got him some T shirts and a zippo lighter. Apparently owning a zippo lighter is the secret dream of every guy and I don't see the point when I ask him where the lighter is, and he replies "at home". *shrug* but well if it keeps him happy so let it be.

I've been feeling rather depressed lately and I wonder if it's not because of the incoming "time of the month". I'm bored as well and my workaholic nature is kicking in: I need to do something in order to be happy :/ I'm tired of packing up my stuffs and I just want to go empty handed and buy new stuffs there because there'll be more trendy stuffs in Canada and more appropriate for the weather. It's like I am living in between two worlds: I can't make any future plans now since I am not in Canada yet and I can't plan for things here now as I am leaving soon. It sucks big deal. Surfing sites like design sponge, tiny ass apartments, makes me want to own my own place so bad. I guess I'll have to e-mail some friends to get some "apartment 101" tips. I do want to be able to repaint my walls though and add shelves. Maybe to keep myself busy, it would not hurt to create a visual journal of "the apartment of my dreams" with furnitures pics, fabrics and colours combo etc.. who knows it could be of some use later on and I can collect paint chips :) Martha Stewart has also some yummy interior decor pictures *sigh* House of my dream, where are thou?

Sunday, March 14, 2010


My Macbook backlit keys won't light up whether I am in a dim room or pitch black. At least I know it's not some hardware related since by using lab tick, it's working. So now I have two useless keys: f5 and f6 that are supposed to control the back keys brightness. i ended assigning these keys as shortcuts in lab tick to control the brightness so as to have some peace of mind. Else I know this issue would have eaten me for days. I went through several mac forums and it helps to know that I am not alone. Maybe the light sensor is busted. *shrug* I can't recall if the backlit keys were working when I first had my Mac book pro. Oh well but it bugs me when things don't work perfectly whether i use it or not. Bah I can always hit the apple store later this month in Canada since there is none in Mauritius; only resellers and I don't trust them with my laptop.

Packing up is proving itself to be more tedious than expected. I am sad so say that I will have to leave most of my books if I want to bring my scrap supplies. At most I'll ask my brother to bring some for me or ask for excess luggage if this option is available. Sure I can rebuy all my books but this is currently not an option as I'll have to limit my expenses once in Canada until I get a job. There are so many things on my mind and sometimes I feel overwhelmed :/ I'm already surfing ikea and related sites for apartment related items and maybe I should slow down and just breathe. Les choses viendront d'elles même en temps et lieux.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

what have you achieved this week?

So I finally moved my butt and all my books, well 98%, are upstairs in the spare kitchen. I've already sorted them into piles: to sell, to give, and to keep. dad refuses that I bring my book by cargo because I'll pay more than their value worth but I will bring them by other means since I am not willing to re-buy my whole collection of books by Margaret Atwood, Haruki Murakami, moomins etc. These costed time and money since most I had to buy online and the moomins series were sheer luck in a store in Mauritius. Online I could not find them. maybe most of my luggage will be books or I could cheat by carrying most of them in my carry-on but it'll be heavy and I need space for spare clothing since I am doing an 8 hours transit in Heathrow..damnit. well I'll find means.

I also started working on journal pages inspired from those made in the course "remains of the day". Unfortunately I don't have enough money now-need to save those pennies to bring to Canada- to take the course so got my inspiration from pages posted online in various blogs. Now I only need to find a way to sew the pages to the cover. It took me quite some fiddling to figure out how to get the pages right but I am happy so far. I'll use it during my airplane trip and transit..when i won't have access to my scrap papers, stamps and paints. I'm definitely planning to sign up for the class once I am settle in Montreal and thanks God the classes are opened until Dec 2010. it makes me want to take my grand ma's old singer machine with me to sew papers..LOL

I also started doing "adult" stuffs like looking at bank accounts, internet access, phones etc. I want a iphone so bad but we'll see because the 3 years contract is not to my advantage esp if I move to Toronto later on unless they're willing to switch my number etc.. Hmm need to note this down and ask the seller later on. I should work on my cv and resume as well so that I don't have to rush once I land. Ah the boring stuffs :/I also need to buy a printer. well it seems taht budget wise there are some hard months coming ahead unless I get a job..

“ There's no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love. There is only a scarcity of resolve to make it happen Dr. Wayne Dyer (born 1940); Author, Speaker
You cannot escape the results of your thoughts. Whatever your present environment may be, you will fall, remain or rise with your thoughts, your vision, your ideal. You will become as small as your controlling desire; as great as your dominant aspiration.James Allen (1864-1912); Writer"

Friday, March 5, 2010

deco tape heaven

I should stay away from but look at these gorgeous japanese/masking deco tapes! I'm sure if I go to japan one day I'll ruin myself in buying useless stuffs just because they're soo cute!! These tapes are definitely on my "to buy" list...

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

sigh..too hot

i think i should stop pigging on snacks late at night because now i've a bitter aftertaste in my mouth. yucky. it's hot and i am bed. After reading
daisy yellow blog, i felt better about my journaling and has been working on it since yesterday. I still need more time to get back to my pencils-drawing though. I applied for my birth certificate copy and need to fetch it on Friday. I swear the heat in the city is enough to stop me from going there! I finally got my tae bo DVDs as well and will start working out tomorrow. I've been lazying around for too long. Trying those new DVDs will give me an excuse to get off the bed/computer chair o.O; As much as I am excited to move to Montreal, I am having second thoughts as well. One thing I am sure is that I don't want to stay here-Mauritius- but at the same time i feel like I will be leaving part of me. It feels even more weird when you come back after years living abroad and see how people have gotten old and that you've missed so many events where you should have been present; it's like growing up missing an arm. There's an embarrassing, "clumsy" feeling that prevails.

At least that was how I felt when I came back from my uni years and saw my parents: suddenly i realized how old they were and how fragile too. Now i wonder in how many years will I see them again? Last time I noticed the deep wrinkles my mother is starting to have around her eyes, the growth spur my brother went through and how estranged we are now from our childhood. It's true that when you see people everyday, you unconsciously take them for granted and there is a call back to reality only when you see them after a long time or something tragic happens. during those 3 years i took many things for granted, I don't have regrets per se; i'm just puzzled and scared that when the regrets will come it'll be too late to mend things up. I should learn to be more spontaneous.. 3 years in Mauritius and I have become overly suspicious and cautious about people and it seems that my past is catching up on me.

I feel frustrated because right now I am struggling to lay down my thoughts on paper/blog.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

day 3

since i resigned from my job. have i done anything meaningful (to understand something apart: eat, sleep and the internet) ? nope..i still have to clean up my stuffs, packed my books and so on but all i do is nap in the afternoon, eat and nap again. it seems that the lazy bug has stung me or something. well at least tomorrow i am going to the city to have my birth certificate updated and will call HR for my reference letter. i feel so uninspired for anything and even less to pack up. art wise i am torn between using most of my supplies now until i leave (so that i've less to bring along) and buying more online to be shipped to Canada. I am coveting the Zutter bind it all that's on sale for 69 CND and shipped for cheap. I signed up for an online journalling class which to my utter dismay will start on the 22nd March-I thought I would have access to the archived class so that I'll start messing around now- and in the mean while I am bored.

well i could always work on my suzy blu classes which i started working on but never finished because i am amongst those who're unable to follow a plan. i'll follow the base and then start to get distracted once i master the basics which is baaadddd because practice makes perfect and i'll never get anywhere if i lose interest once i can master the basics of something. this is why i dabble on many stuffs and is a jack of all trade but master of none. i do have plans to take my calligraphy to a higher level though because i love text. jeez i'm bored..i still need to work on a few chunkies but need inspiration. surfing mail art sites is not helping for now since i feel inadequate when i see the creations instead of feeling inspired. i'm even struggling when it comes to journalling. i guess i should concentrate on going with the flow than feel compelled to create something.